Posts filed under ‘funny’

proof of how girls are evil

i stole these from kozzi :) i thought they were hilarious

Proof that girls are evil:
First we state that “girls require time and money.”
Girl = Time x Money

And as we all know “time is money.”
Time = Money

And because “money is the root of all evil.”
Money = sqrt(Evil)

Originally we have:
Girl = Time x Money

And now we substitue everything in, we get:
Girl = Money x Money
Girl = sqrt(Evil) x sqrt(Evil)
Girl = (sqrt(Evil))^2
Gril = Evil

But here’s another proof to show how men are THREE TIMES worse

Proof that men are 3 times more evil:
First we state that men need time, money, girl and sex.
Men = Time x Money x Girl x Sex

We all know “time is money.”
Time = Money

Therefore:
Men = Money x Money x Girl x Sex

And we all know to many men:
Girl = Sex

As for men’s proof showing “girls are evil” So
Girl = Evil then,
Evil = Sex

Men = Money x Money x Evil x Evil
Men = Money^2 x Evil^2

And because “money is the root of all evil.”
Men = (sqrt(Evil))^2 x Evil^2
Men = Evil x Evil^2
Men = Evil^3

Men’s proof:
Girl = Evil

Girl’s proof:
Men = Evil^3

So we are forced to conclude men are worse than girls.

silly silly question

here’s a question andy thought up last nite for you LOL

f_ _ _   extinguisher (two words)

what is above?
hint: you may need to use it during gas leakage.
let’s see how well you do. done? click below
(more…)

toliet paper

i asked andy last nite if his college has parties and picnics. he said yes and he just had to read the toliet paper to find out when. i was like WHAT?! then he told me that his college puts flyers/calendar of school’s activities on the back of the doors of the toliet stalls. and they call them toliet paper. amusing. i wonder if any other colleges do that?

FOTR captions

they are back. i finally uploaded them.

Two Towers Caption

For those who missed the FOTR ones, someone sent me the bad captions for the Two Towers one. I hope you enjoy them.

FOTR captions

OH MY GOD.. these are so great. you have to read them. the wonderful wonderful Fellowship of the Ring captions!!!

:( midterms

midterms are coming up and i feel sooo uninspired to do anything… arrg..

i found new some “cool” signs last nite
Over a gynecologist’s office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

On a Plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.”

At a dry cleaners: “Drop your pants here.”

On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

Pizza shop slogan: “7 days without pizza makes one weak.”

Outside a muffler shop: “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

In a veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: “Hello. Can we pick your nose?”

On an electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”

In a non-smoking area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”

At an optometrist’s office: “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”

In the front yard of a funeral home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.”

why is there a hk phone on our toliet.

thanks to daynah for the reminder. let me tell you an interesting story. do you believe there’s a hellokitty phone on our toliet? well, let me show you some pictures:
hkphone1hkphone2
it doesn’t look much like a phone unless you open it:
hkphone3

last sunday andy got up early and wanted to replace the sound card in my computer since my computer somehow stopped recognizing my old sound card. he opened the box for the new sound card and took the material out and set them on the carpet in the living room. but all the sudden, he had to go the bathroom really fast so he went. before he got done, the phone rang. since he didn’t want the phone to wake me up, he got off the toliet and ran to the living room to pick up the phone. very unfortunately he accidentally stepped on the new sound card. he didn’t only break the sound card, he hurt his foot too. his foot got all bloody :( :( with wounds. (he’s fine now.)

since i bought a hk phone from china and it’s so small and cute, i’ve decided to put it in use. the phone now sits marvelously on our toliet. and for those who don’t have a phone in their bathroom, i’d highly recommend putting one there. it’s unbelievably convenient! hahahaha seriously!

oh btw, my computer is fixed now. it turned out the sound card was fine. it was only because of my PCI slot. andy moved the old sournd card to a different slot and now it’s working ;)

I Miss Dodo

Wow. She’s been away three days now, and I have not been able to get a good night of sleep yet. It seems like I either get to bed late; not being able to sleep, or I end up getting miraculously timed phone calls early in the morning when I am sleeping. It is different sleeping in the same bed, but the person that you are accustomed to holding is not there.

KFC was busy over the 4th of July week. Seems like everyone employee wanted time off so it left us shorthanded too.

At home I have acquired a taste for sloppy rice. I felt like having some because of the little radishes that Dodo bought from Chicago. I made three cups of rice (which was way too much) and it turned out to be very close to a GALLON of sloppy rice!! I have been enjoying eating it though. I think now I understand the appeal that Chinese have toward it. I would like to see Dodo’s face when I make so much sloppy rice for us when she comes back!!

One funny thing that just happened today is when I called to see if Dodo was home and the person that answered the phone did not understand a word of english, just like I could not understand the chinese she was yelling at me when she hung up the phone!!

wedding crase

andy and i were thinking of crazy things we could do for our wedding.. we were laughing our heads off.. i know most of these will probably not come true but it’s so fun just to let your creativity go wild..

here are couple i remember:
1. send invitations to couple gullible (like andy’s cousin Blake) people telling them it’s gonna be a costume party. so they would dress up for the wedding and everyone is gonna think they are crazy.

2. have an apple eating contest along with other couples. the apples will be hanging from the ceiling and everything’s fair except other apples besides ours will be made of plastic.

3. have a blind fold and sticking contest (it probably has a name but i dont know)… blind fold people, spin them around for a while and give them something to stick to the board couple feet away. we will get let’s say some obese male celebrity (haven’t figured out who)’s topless poster on the board and give the person a pair of bras to stick to it.

4. andy says he’s gonna wear a curly blond wig LOL

ADD TO LIST:
1. play musical chair with rolling chairs (suggested by lele)
2. play dodge ball with watermelons/water balloons (suggested by jason)
3. the blindfold bride must identify the broom from a group of males by touching their butts (suggested by ecila!)

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