You know it’s love when
- the first thing you think of in the morning and the last thing you think of before you go to bed is him/her.
- the very thought of being without them makes you want to cry
- whenever you are feeling down, all you have to do is imagine their cute little face and you begin to smile :)
- you get that feeling of fuzzy e rushy love (i.e. you feel all funny inside, you get butterflies in your tummy)
- you would give anything just for time to stop so you can be with them just a few more minutes….
- thinking of him/her sleeping brings you the most peaceful, sweetest feeling
- you can communicate with them without speaking
- you make up little things that only the both of you know about
- all you want is to make them happy
- you get a rush just from seeing them, or a touch. better than any drug
- they can make you cry so easily, be it from sadness or happiness
- you can never imagine even being with anyone else
The truth about true love
- If you find yourself in love with someone who does not love you, be gentle with yourself. There is nothing wrong with you. Love just didn’t choose to rest in the other person’s heart.
- If you find someone else in love with you and you don’t love him, feel honored that love came and called at your door, but gently refuse the gift you cannot return.
- If you fall in love with another, and he falls in love with you, and then love chooses to leave, do not try to reclaim it or to assess blame. Let it go. There is a reason and there is a meaning. You will know in time.
- Remember that you don’t choose love. LOVE CHOOSES YOU. All you can really do is accept it for all its mystery when it comes into your life. Feel the way it fills you to overflowing, then reach out and give it away. Give it back to the person who brought it alive in you. Give it to others who deem poor in spirit. Give it to the world around you in anyway you can. This is where many lovers go wrong. Having been so long without love, they understand love only as a need. They see their hearts as empty places that will be filled by love, and they begin to look at love as something that flows to them rather than from them. Remember this, and keep it to your heart. Love has its own time, its own seasons, and its own reason for coming and going. You cannot bribe it or coerce it, or reason it into staying. You can only embrace it when it arrives and give it away when it comes to you. But if it chooses to leave from your heart or from the heart of your lover, there is nothing you can do and there is nothing you should do.
- Love always had been and always will be a mystery. Be glad that it came to live for a moment in your life. If you keep your heart open it will come again.
Love or Infatuation?
- Infatuation is instant desire. It is one set of glands calling to another.
- Love is a friendship that has caught fire. It takes root and grows, one day at a time.
- Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would just as soon not examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.
- Love is quiet understanding and the mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by his/her presence even when he/she is away. Miles do not separate you. You want him/her nearer, but near or far, you know he/she is yours and you can wait.
- Love says, “Be patient. Do not panic. Plan your future with confidence.”
- Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. If you are honest, you can admit it is difficult to be in one another’s company unless you are sure it will end – in intimacy.
- Love is the maturation of friendship. You must be friends before you can be lovers.
- Infatuation lacks confidence. When he/she is away you wonder if he/she is cheating. Sometimes you check.
- Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. Your beloved one feels that also and that makes them even more trustworthy.
- Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret later, but love never will.
- Love is an upper. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person.
Ten questions to ask yourself about your relationship
- What do I want from this relationship?
- Have I told him/her what is important to me in a relationship?
- Does he/she tell me what is important to him/her in a relationship?
- Am I happy with the way things are?
- What type of changes would make it better?
- Can we talk about touching?
- Do I feel good about the touching we do?
- Am I feeling pressured or am I pressuring?
- How does the relationship affect other things or people in my life?
- Who can I talk to when things get tough?
The definition of mature love
- both are individuals apart from the other
- each accepts the fact that neither is perfect
- the relationship is strong in tough times as well as happy times
- the love gives each person energy to devote to all aspects of life
- the two people are close friends
- each person continues to grow as an independent human being
- there is joy in giving as well as receiving
- there is honesty and trust between the two people
- each feels a responsibility to the others well being
Infatuation is not love
- the person depends on the relationship for self esteem
- the person takes more from the relationship than they give
- each is jealous of the others separate activities
- the relationship drains the person of energy
- the person is afraid that the other person will lose interest in them
- the person can only think of the other person