Archive for April 26th, 2003

why can’t i stop dreaming?

i’ve been crying a lot lately. i don’t even know why sometimes. yesterday i missed andy terribly at school. i was walking under the sun back and forth trying to decide whether i wanted to skip a class to take a bus to see andy. i finally decided not to. i wanted to call him just to say i missed him but i never did it. trying to reach him at kfc is so hard. no one ever seems to pick up the phone. it would just make me more sad if i called. it’s been a LONG time since he visited me at school. we used to walk along the river in a beautiful day like yesterday. every time i think about that, i feel so selfish. andy’s been working so hard day and nite for our future and i’m here trying to grasp dreamy romance – something so unrealistic. i take away a lot of his resting time at nite too.. just so i feel less lonely. i want to keep him awake.. isn’t that selfish? but
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